An Open Letter to Everyone Still Trying to Find Their Own Way

Hey, you.

Yes, you. I’m writing you this letter to let you know that whatever you’re doing or wherever you are in life, you are doing good. You are enough. You are beautiful. You are loved.

And you are most definitely not alone.

Your journey is certainly not solitary, but one that likens to a thread intertwined and interwoven with the rest to form a majestic, colorful tapestry.

Okay, I don’t mean to sound all fortune cookie-ish, but what I’m really trying to say is that wherever you are on this path you’re taking, you are not alone.

Most of us are still trying to figure out what our paths are going to lead us to – yes, myself included. Most twenty-somethings I know are pretty much going through the same thing, and I’m telling you right now: THAT’S PERFECTLY FINE.

Here’s the thing: I actually wish I could tell you that everything will turn out like you always planned it to in the end, but that would just be a blatant lie (and a shitty cliché at that). Life does not always give us what we want and it’s something that we should accept wholeheartedly if we are to keep journeying through this world. But I am not, in any way, saying that you should throw in the towel.

I’m saying it’s perfectly fine to carve your own path and do it your way. It’s perfectly fine to tread your path at on your own pace, as long as you don’t give up. It’s perfectly fine to get exhausted. We all get tired sometimes, and it’s okay to admit that.

It’s perfectly okay to listen to what your heart is saying.

Be good to yourself because no one else will.

Indeed, life is full of pain and suffering and sorrow. I’m afraid it’s all painfully inevitable. But, thankfully, there’s an upside to all of that.

Difficulty, hardship, and suffering all have one denominator. They’re all great motivators. 

Think about it. Suffering is what keeps us on our feet. It almost always pushes us to become better, driving us to learn from our mistakes and gain wisdom from our experiences.

Suffering is also what makes us human. It’s what makes us feel alive. (Surely, some of you Westworld fans out there might be keen on what I’m going on about) We definitely won’t be able to appreciate the positive things in our lives had we not tasted sadness or defeat. Truly, suffering is what keeps us grounded and grateful for the things we have achieved.

The bottomline is, where you are right now is where you should be. And there’s nothing wrong with that.

Life shouldn’t be a rat race, after all.

Always,

Liz

Note to self: Be good. To yourself and others.

###

P.S. Do you have anything to share to the rest of us still trying to find our own way in life? Any thoughts or pieces of advice? Share them in the comments below, guys. Thank you.

 

An Open Letter to Everyone Still Trying to Find Their Own Way

Agos

Paulit-ulit mo man akong saktan,
Tila paulit-ulit rin akong nahuhulog at nadadala sa agos ng pag-ibig
Walang kapaguran
Walang hangganan;

Parang mga talon o karagatan,
Patuloy na dumadaloy
Patuloy na lumalalim;

Animo’y pwersa ng kalikasan,
Tinutulak ako papalayo
Ngunit hinihila rin ako papalapit
Araw-araw ibinubuhos ang pagsinta;

Kawangis ng ilog o batis,
Inaanod ang pait
Inaanod ang sakit
Walang pagod
Walang hanggan;

Hiling ko sana’y hindi manuyot ang bukal para sa aking irog
Hindi sana maubos ang pagtangi
Sapagkat kahit ang pinakamalalim na talon o karagatan
Kung wari’y puro sakit at pait ang nilalaman
Ay malalason rin at mamamatay,
Gaano man ito kalalim
Gaano man ito kaganda

Agos

A Look Back on that Blue-Tainted November Night

I actually started writing this post about three years ago and never really got back to it, hence the somewhat pretentiously-worded title. Now that I’m trying my hand at freelance writing, I thought I’d give blogging a go again and – finally – finish telling this story.

So, here it goes.

If there’s one thing life taught me, it’s that it never really tells you when something special is going to happen. Every day, we wake up unsure of things that lie ahead, and most of us are either filled with excitement or dread at the mere thought of not knowing. I am often amazed at how a single circumstance moment or event can turn your life around and change it forever.

For me, one of those moments was the ‘blue-tainted November night’. Why, you ask? Well, because it was the night I met the love of my life.  

Okay, I have to stop right here because I want to be totally honest with you before I continue. FACT: I am as sentimental and emotional as they come, so I do have the propensity to blurt out sappy, cheesy clichés like “I just met the love of my life.” That’s just who I am. On the other hand, I also write a lot about pain, misery, sorrow, and darkness – both in the context of my personal life and of society. This means that I reserve the right to speak freely on this blog about anything that I deem relevant, as is within my right to free speech. I don’t mean to spew legal jargon or anything, but I guess what I’m really trying to say is that I’ve reserved this little corner of the Internet to write stuff that I think should be talked about, so I welcome everyone else who can foster intelligent discourse on this blog, as long as it does not cultivate hate.

Phew. What an interlude. Sorry about that.

Where were we?

Ah, yes, the ‘blue-tainted November night’.  The night I met the love of my life.

Well, the thing is, that night was truly special not just because it was the moment I found my significant other, but because it was the night that I truly opened myself up to a million different possibilities. And I will always be grateful for that night.

You see, if it weren’t for that night, I probably would’ve never opened up to seeing love beyond gender and sexuality – or, at the very least, it would’ve taken me quite longer to realize it. Looking back at it now, I realize that that night propelled me into this progressive state of mind I’m in right now – the sort of headspace that has helped me grow wiser and empowered me to become the woman I am today.

If it weren’t for that night, I probably would have been stuck in a rut. I probably would have been satisfied with small hopes and dreams – dreams that would have left me stagnant, complacent, and moribund. While it didn’t happen overnight, of course, that night paved the way for me to reach for my dreams and encouraged me to dream bigger. That moment gave me the courage to explore the countless possibilities and opportunities for growth and development, and I will always be thankful for that.

Most of all, that night taught me to follow my heart. While I do admit that I am no stranger to taking risks and doing what my heart tells me to, that night taught me to look beyond societal norms and follow what my heart says. Like I said, that night taught me to see love beyond gender, sexuality, race, or creed, and it was indeed that fateful night that I realized that love (or attraction) knows no bounds. It helped me understand what I’d been raised to go against, as it not only helped me gain perspective but it touched my heart in a way that only love can, and I’ve been fighting for that love ever since.

I certainly think that life doesn’t prepare us for these moments because it has its own way of making things beautiful in its own time.

A Look Back on that Blue-Tainted November Night

Buhay at Kamatayan

Alam mo ‘yung pagmamahal
Na pakiramdam mo said na said ka na
Pero kapag nariyan na ang sinisinta
Tila bigla kang nagkakaroon ng lakas na muling ibigin siya

Alam mo ‘yung pag-ibig
Na tipong nakakalasing,
Nakakalunod, nakamamatay
Ani mo’y isang malubhang karamdaman
Na walang ibang lunas kundi ang haplos niya

Para kang naaadik sa isang halik lang niya
Nakakalimutan ang sakit na hatid mismo ng
nag-uumapaw mong pag-ibig sa kanya
Naglalaho ang pagod ng walang-sawa
mong pagsinta

Marahil nga ako lang ang nakakaalam
Marahil ako lang rin ang nakakaramdam
Marahil ipinanganak ako upang ibigin siya
Marahil hindi ito ang kaso para sa kanya

Alam mo ‘yung pagsinta na ang sakit sakit,
parang mamamatay ka na?
Oo? Hindi? Ewan?
Kasi para sa’kin, ito ‘yung pag-ibig
Na unti-unti akong pinapatay
Pero nananatiling dahilan para ako ay mabuhay.

Buhay at Kamatayan